Woad

Sung to the tune of “Men of Harlech”

What’s the use of wearing braces
Vests and pants and boots with laces
Spats or hats you buy in places
Down the Brompton Road?

What’s the use of shirts of cotton
Studs that always get forgotten?
These affairs are simply rotten
Better far is woad!

Woad’s the stuff to show men
Woad to scare your foe men
Boil it to a brilliant hue
And rub it on your back and your abdomen

Ancient Briton never did hit on
Anything as good as woad to fit on
Neck or knees or where you sit on
Tailors you be blowed!

Romans came across the Channel
All dressed up in tin and flannel
Half a pint of woad per man’ll
Dress us more than these

Saxons you can waste your stitches
Building beds for bugs in britches
We have woad to clothe us which is
Not a nest for fleas

Romans keep your armours
Saxons your pyjamas
Hairy coats were meant for goats
Gorillas, yaks, retriever dogs and llamas

March on Snowdon with your woad on
Never mind if we get rained or snowed on
Never wants a button sewed on
Bottoms up to Woad!